Gordon Robinson | To vote or not to vote

I doubt many noticed, but, last year, I was absent from this space for a while.

It began in late May after ten days hospitalisation following major surgery and a rocky post-op. It has taken too long to more publicly (already did it on my blog) thank those who helped me through that ordeal. I had the best surgical team led by the superb Mark Newnham; brilliant Derek Mitchell (now Professor Derek Mitchell); and Anesthetist Melody Isaacs who couldn’t have been more gifted, attentive, caring and thorough.

The nurses were wonderful especially the highly professional, efficient Nurse Brown and kind, gentle, compassionate Nurse Inshanali (no relation to 1970s mystery spinner). Special mention must be made of my two Gregory Isaacses, the magnificent Nurse Carter and thoughtful, generous Nurse Moxam.

But the Leader of the Pack; the Boss of Bosses; the Jewel in the Crown was the Old Ball and Chain who conducted the entire orchestra. She put in ten consecutive 14 hour shifts (16 hours day of surgery) lovingly anxious to deal with my many indignities leaving only technical work to nurses like intravenous lines and delivery of medication. Every morning, before 6.30a.m., the pitter-patter of her sandals was heard outside the door and she stayed until after 9.00p.m. Every indignity was rewarded with a kiss.

The. Perfect. Wife!

Since reaching full grumpiness I resumed making your literary lives as miserable as possible. In particular I’ve been banging on about constitutional reform because Government’s input is negligible and Opposition’s appears insincere. PNP’s big ticket item is, of course, Privy Council appeals abolition and CCJ substitution - an issue I can’t fathom why Government won’t just accept without further shilly-shallying. That’s not true. I do know why. Neither Party wants to transfer a scintilla of power to We the People. CCJ issue is a convenient distraction ensuring the current charade only results in replacement of a White King by a Black King. But not even the Black King can be chosen by us. No sireee Bob. He must be chosen for us by JLP/PNP. Michael Jackson reminded us it doesn’t matter if you’re black or white. A king is a King. English musical rebels satirize Kings:

I’m ’Enery the eighth, I am

’Enery the eighth, I am, I am

I got married to the widow next door

She’s been married seven times before.

And every one was an ’Enery (’ENERY!)

She wouldn’t have a Willie or a Sam (NO SAM!)

I’m her eighth old man named ’Enery

’Enery the eighth, I am

JLP/PNP want reform without change. JLP started this farce with a secretly appointed CRC inappropriately chaired by the Minister of Constitutional Affairs; and a time limit for Constitutional Reform to be done obviously intended to provide political advantage instead of change. PNP co-operated until it could find a valuable issue for political mileage but not affecting the status quo.

This must be the Guy Lombardo Show!

Lookie here: neither JLP nor PNP give a flying fig about us except right around now when they show their love by making wild promises to trick us into voting for them. Up to forty-five years ago we were turning out in massive numbers (87 per cent in 1980) in general elections. But, election by election, the veil is lifting. We can see through the illusion of the sham vote offered.

I keep telling you what we’re experiencing in Jamaica isn’t voter apathy. It’s voter revolt!

I recently saw a May 2025 study by UWI’s Lloyd Waller and Stephen Johnson entitled “Who is the undecided?” The problem I have with these academic studies is their disengagement from reality. From the very first page, lamenting the steady decline in voter turnout, the study exposes a flawed premise:

“When a minority becomes the predominant voice in electing a government, the decisions made may not adequately represent the [majority’s] broader interests.”

Oh dear. Here’s what’s real. NO JAMAICAN gets to elect government. All we’re allowed to elect is a MP. So the tribally blind are clueless who they are voting for. Candidates’ names are often unknown. They vote as if Jamaica is one constituency.

The rest of us simply don’t bother.....

Don’t believe me? Let MP Everald Warmington tell oonu how voting go inna Jamdung:

“Yu may not like your MP. Yu no want him. Might be an a….hole. But him better than di PNP a…..hole. So work wid ’im. If yu t’ink yu oppose to George Wright go behind di screen; close yu eyes and say mi a vote fi Andrew Holness. Vote for Labour Party. You don’t like yu candidate? Vote for Andrew Holness; Labour Party. Put di X beside di [effing] Bell”

Most commentators focused on his colourful language forcing a swift, terse apology from Warmy. But, for me, the language was nothing out of the ordinary. I’d heard as much from USA’s President less than a week before. What was important to me was the message.

Here a senior government MP confessed that voting in Jamaica was a facade. He instructed voters to ignore the MP candidate. Vote for a symbol!

So, with the greatest respect for Messrs Waller and Johnson, the premise “Who is the undecided” is immaterial. Nobody is undecided. In Jamaica we keep decisions close to our chests. We certainly won’t be telling strangers asking questions for “pollsters”.

We decide to vote or not. More and more of us are deciding not to vote. Waller/Johnson study found that only 34 per cent would probably vote. Then it called the other 66 per cent “undecided” and investigated their demographics. Panderson and Blue Dolt also proceed on a similar misconception that not voting equates being unable or unwilling to decide including between JLP and PNP. It’s insulting. Some of us know we don’t have a real vote. Others don’t want to decide between JLP and PNP because they’ve DECIDED it’s six of one and half dozen of the other.

Not one Jamaican is UNDECIDED about anything. Both political parties need to get over themselves. It’s not about them. It’s about the system!

Everywhere operating under Westminster governance systems is experiencing declining voter turnout. In UK, 2024 general election voter turnout was 60 per cent [the lowest since 2001 (59.4 per cent)]. From 1922-1997, every UK general election recorded over 70 per cent turnout. Afterwards, none reached 70 per cent.

Unless PNP/JLP wake up to the reality that, in a Jamaican society still structured and governed as it was in 1962, they’re irrelevant except to their sycophants they’ll wonder about “undecided” and call it “voter apathy” until Jesus returns. We’ve survived by ignoring politicians’ puerile patter for decades. If they continue playing the same electoral games we’ll continue ignoring them thank you very much.

If you want us to vote, give us something to vote for. Give us fundamental governance restructuring; accountable government not rubber stamp parliaments; a direct vote for every political leader/representative. Cancel elitist Delegates only votes for Party leaders. Separate cabinet from parliament. We will NOT invite insanity by expecting different results despite your doing the same things. Look in the mirror. Make a change!

Herman’s Hermits, led by the great Peter Noone, was one of many Beatles lookalike groups in 1960s. Spoof and comedy were their shtick. They found their biggest success with ’ Enery the eighth, I am, a satire of an infamous English King, written in 1910 by Fred Murray and R. P. Weston; recorded in 1911 by British Hall comedian Harry Champion. Herman’s Hermits simply took the chorus, sang it twice and made a huge hit out of the shortest pop song on record.

When my hospital physiotherapist insisted we dance as part of my rehab this was the song I asked Old BC to play on her Magic Rectangle.

Speaking of hospitals, remember Mark Newnham? He told me he hasn’t voted in the last three elections because there’s nothing to vote for. He insists it’s not enough for him to be anti-policy. Somebody must give him something to support. In the past two weeks a lifelong high-ranking JLP activist and a lifelong PNP supporter told me that, for the first time, they won’t vote. These are real people with real concerns. During a pandemic and PNP rift, voter turnout fell to 38%. How’ll JLP/PNP spin it if it’s even lower?

So don’t get me started on the perpetual rant of the brainless that if you don’t vote you can’t criticize. Bee Ess! Low voter turnout isn’t an indictment on us. It’s an indictment on them! Your voice in Jamaica’s affairs is directly proportional to the amount of taxes you pay.

He who pays the Piper calls the tune!

Peace and Love.

Gordon Robinson is an attorney-at-law. Send feedback to columns@gleanerjm.com