Why is promiscuous daughter accepted, and gay son not?

THE EDITOR, Madam:

Across Jamaica, a familiar but troubling question often arises in conversation: “Would you rather have a gay son or a promiscuous daughter?” More often than not, the answer is swift and telling: “Mi rather di daughter.”

This response is not just a casual remark; it reveals a deeper cultural discomfort, one that prioritises public perception over personal freedom, and masculinity over humanity.

In our society, male homosexuality continues to be harshly stigmatised, seen as a direct challenge to traditional ideals of manhood. Meanwhile, a daughter perceived as sexually promiscuous, though still criticised, is often met with far more tolerance. The difference? One is easier to ignore or hide, while the other, in the minds of many, brings visible “shame” to the family.

A 2023 study titled. Being LGBT in Jamaica, supported by the United Nations Development Programme, revealed that 75 per cent of LGBTQ+ Jamaicans lack family support, and 83 per cent had fear of violence due to their identity. These figures are not abstract; they reflect real lives lived in silence and fear.

Additionally, a 2014 Human Rights Watch report found that many LGBTQ+ youths in Jamaica are forced into homelessness after being rejected by their families, sometimes violently so.

This speaks to a painful truth; our love, even for our own children, is often conditional. We are more prepared to forgive what we perceive as moral failure than we are to accept someone’s truth.

But the tides are slowly turning. Globally, and even here at home, younger generations are rethinking the norms they were handed. A 2024 Gallup study showed that over 20 per cent of Gen Z adults identify as LGBTQ+, demonstrating a growing openness and willingness to question outdated ideologies.

Jamaica is a country built on resilience, faith, and community. But we must ask ourselves: What good are those values if they do not extend to all of our people? If we are to grow as a nation, socially and morally, we must begin to listen more deeply, reflect more honestly, and love more unconditionally.

It is time we stopped confusing discomfort with danger, and difference with disrespect. Acceptance does not mean agreement; it means empathy. And that is something we should never be afraid to extend.

REBEL QUILL